Eye, Ghost.
Eye touch a face made of glass. The nothing that builds itself while Eye sleep. Eye smash the construct to remember its ghost. Eye never reach the edge. Words by Ben Mirov and images by Paula McCartney.
Eye, Ghost.
Eye touch a face made of glass. The nothing that builds itself while Eye sleep. Eye smash the construct to remember its ghost. Eye never reach the edge. Words by Ben Mirov and images by Paula McCartney.
Eye wake up in a construct. Eye lay on my
bed and sweat. Eye replay final moments. Eye try to
picture her face. Eye program a future version of myself
to remember it, slick with seawater, ringed with wet hair.
Eye go to a little shop where they sell machines
that keep you up. Eye lay the crumpled body next
to a convenience store. Eye place the organs in separate
aluminum trays. Eye stand on the street like every car
belongs to her. Eye Know. It doesn’t matter what Eye
say to the recording device. Nothing can save the face
blowing across the face. Eye drink too much before the
game. Eye can’t walk to the end of the block.
Eye turn around and hear a voice. Eye smash my
face into a neck. Eye try to sleep there for
a night. Eye never open the envelope marked C. Eye
wonder what he’s like in bed. Eye erase her from
the poem about the dark. Eye stretch my arm through
brainwork’s shadowy circuits. Eye bum around on couches for a
month. Eye tell them nothing about my life. Eye hear
the words outside at night. Eye plan to be another
shadow in the body of a deer. Eye come out
of BART with headphones and no memory. Eye wake up
in a grocery store. Eye wander to a map. Eye
wander through the rain. In my dreams, Eye have the
same problems. Eye live in an empty carcass. Eye work
in a cloud. Eye can’t slow down the shadow process.
Eye can’t go to sleep. Eye go down on the
breeze. The breeze is wet. Eye taste sea urchin and
spit. Eye can never touch the same breast twice. Eye
can never revisit our forest. Eye touch a night machine
in the shape of a woman. She can only stay
for a moment. Eye put her face inside a bed.
She sucks my nipple while Eye sleep. Eye see the
dead part in everything, shining and dull. Its hands are
raised like it’s begging for food. It gives me my
third drink for free. Eye erase her from the poem
about the park. Eye can’t cope with waves that help
me sleep. Eye have cruel dreams. Eye buy noodles at
midnight. Eye arrive at a bar like one who can
mimic. Eye pause in the mirror. Eye make things up
to disappear. She spends too long talking and Eye get
lonely. My brains are dripping on a wood bench. Eye
say green bunnies to protect us from the silence we
make. There are glass windows all around love. Eye tell
her nothing about my life. Eye feel like sex with
an android on television. Eye beat the shit out of
the steering wheel. Eye think of others washing their hands
in a cold dark beam. Eye can’t decipher the code.
It was written on a napkin. Eye touch my hard-on.
Eye step back outside. Eye hear the voice that shifts
through the barriers. Eye feel wrecked by a bunch of
faces. Eye can’t deal with ambiguous nocturnes. Eye speak to
a skull inside the breeze. Eye don’t see the current
that carries me there. Eye walk through love with a
mannequin’s arm. Eye look for a plan to cipher my
life. Eye promise myself to never return. Eye drink Old
English in the kitchen with some crackers. Eye see a
floating head. Eye take huge leaps to a garage full
of weapons. Eye can’t sit still or eat my lamb.
Eye contain computers and a desk. Eye intend to become
myself. Eye hover in front of a chain-link fence for
hours reading signs. Eye finish my paperwork and crash. Eye
have dead bird. Eye learn to restrain and think about
years. Eye empty ideas into a tube. Eye forget ideas
in the shower. Eye can’t find the green bunny poem.
Eye start to freak out. Eye live in a dump
with lots of light. Eye nod my head in silence.
Eye imagine our grandkids wearing nondescript masks. Eye lock the
door as fast as Eye can. Eye see her walking
through darkness and she says nothing. Eye approach her with
my daydream shatterer. Eye try to make a connection. Eye
receive a message from a blank stare. Eye can tell
when a relationship bends. It’s the last thing to touch
the night. Eye kiss and kiss with one earphone. Eye
press send and feel sick. Eye can’t remember her name.
Eye walk through a forest of empties. Eye fall asleep
on the floor. Eye pour myself into a phone call.
Eye avoid a night alone. Eye no longer run from
dream worms. Eye don’t expect to see her for years.
Eye put on a clean t-shirt. Eye need artificial clouds
to live. Eye can’t take off my face. Eye see
like three shows a week. Eye fall in love with
nothingness. Eye lose all of my echoes to friends. Eye
fall in love with patches of skin. Eye don’t expect
a reply. Eye spend the day on the couch. Eye
have dead feelings. They float through the air. They touch
the nodes outside at night. Eye can’t believe my life
was like this a year ago. Eye would lie there
thinking of things Eye had to do. Eye woke up
in a construct. Eye was buying coffee. Eye remember being
in the ocean with her. Eye probably won’t see her
for years. Eye watch the rain through a window. Eye
construct little machines to pass the time. They keep me
awake at night. They float on the currents that move
to the edge. That’s what they’re for. Eye send them
away. Eye never said what Eye meant to say. Eye
can never revisit a moment. Eye can’t shut down the
recording device. Eye touch a face made of glass. The
nothing that builds itself while Eye sleep. Eye smash the
construct to remember its ghost. Eye never reach the edge